Convention Nights ™
Convention Nights ™
I nominate the following elections for you to read.
It’s hard to win reelection. Of the 45 men elected to office, only 21 have successfully won reelection. It’s hard to win when you die, or when your party doesn’t nominate you, or you decide that politically, it’s not viable for you to run again.
I know nothing about this because I have never lost an election. I think I ran for reelection once, but it’s hard to win reelection when you keep progressing through school. You can only be Student Council President for one year.
As we inch closer to the top ten presidential elections of all time, we stop to examine what it was like for two incumbent presidents running against familiar opponents and how we can incorporate convention-like vibes into our lives on a regular basis.
Let's dive in.
13: The Presidential Election of 1900
Election Date: November 6, 1900
The Candidates:
President William McKinley was renominated for the Republican Party, which was giddy about the prospects of a long occupation in the White House. Vice President Garrett Hobart would not be on the ticket in 1900 because he couldn’t overcome the hurdle of being dead.
So, instead, the GOP looked to the young governor of New York and war hero, Theodore Roosevelt, and nominated him at their convention in Philadelphia.
The Democrats met in Kansas City, Missouri, for their convention and rolled the dice with William Bryan Jennings, hoping the Nebraska man could do what he couldn’t do in 1896 and defeat McKinley. Not to worry, Jennings fans, the Democrats will toss him out there again in 1908.
Major Issue of the Day:
The country was emerging from a small depression. We helped Cuba win its independence from Spain, which netted us Puerto Rico and the Philippines as thank-you gifts.
The Winner:
Prosperity.
The United States was celebrating war victory, and everyone was getting rich. What’s not to like?
The States in the Electoral College:
45. Same as four years earlier.
The Electoral College had 447 members, and the winner needed 224 votes.
McKinley cruised to victory in Game Two of the Presidential Reelection Series, flipping five states and winning the popular vote by almost a million.
The 2021 OKH Presidential Ranking:
McKinley comes in at 25. Most historians rank him much higher because they feel this is when the United States became a true world power. We did it through imperialism, but whatever, we fire now.
Why Did I Rank it Here:
McKinley was so confident of beating Jennings that he didn’t even campaign with his old front porch style from 1896.
I love the confidence. People who don’t campaign either know they are going to get crushed or they are going to crush. Also, it allowed Teddy Roosevelt to get some good national campaigning in because he acted like he was running for president by constantly calling Willy his opponent.
If you think getting reelected as a white dude is challenging, imagine being a black president. Or one who, at some point, became black. You might get lucky once, but twice?
Let’s dive in.
12: The Presidential Election of 2012
Election Date: November 6, 2012
The Candidates:
The United States broke tradition and elected a man who was born outside of the United States and obviously was an African plant set to destroy America. His name was Barrack Hussein Obama II.
The 2012 Democratic nomination was a doozy. The president defeated heavy-hitting guys like Darcy Richarson, a historian who eventually dropped out, having secured less than 1% of the primary votes. There was Vermin Supreme, who took on Obama in one state (New Hampshire) and placed third. Finally, there was Randall Terry, who wanted to win the Democratic nomination so badly that he pushed a platform on anti-abortion positions. It makes sense since he was the founder and former president of Operation Rescue or Operation Save America (they couldn’t figure out the name). He finished with over 13,000 popular votes when he ran as an Independent that November.
The only genuine excitement during the process was when Vermin Supreme glitter-bombed Terry during a debate.
The Democrats held their convention in Charlotte, North Carolina, a state they ended up losing.
The Republicans nominated former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney, who was a beautiful, kind, extremely rich man and a terrible candidate. He probably wished he had run against Vermin Supreme.
To match their counterparts, the GOP held their convention in Tampa, Florida, a state they would end up losing.
Major Issue of the Day:
We were still navigating the Great Recession. I still don’t know what was so great about it. Unemployment was 7.8 in 2009 and was 7.8 in the summer of 2012. Thanks a lot, Obama.
Obama also pushed through the Affordable Care Act, which is still around and argued about today.
The Winner:
Righteousness.
Obama flunked the first debate and reminded everyone about it when Joe Biden painfully staggered through his this past June. The biggest difference was that Obama could figure out what he had done wrong and correct it, while Biden couldn’t erase the negative perception of being old.
Despite a ripe opportunity to take out a sitting president, righteousness came through because, dang it, fair or unfair, Obama needed to win.
The States in the Electoral College:
50. Romney flipped two states to his side – North Carolina and Indiana. It’s wild to think that Obama was so popular in 2008 that Indiana voted for him.
The Electoral College had 538 members, and the winner needed 270 votes.
Romney only lost to Obama by half the votes the GOP candidate John McCain did in 2008. This means Mitt lost about 5 million votes.
The 2021 OKH Presidential Ranking:
I ranked Obama 22. C-SPAN ranked him at an average of 10, which is crazy. Joe Biden was a far more productive president, and really, Obama railroaded Joe’s chance of his own deserved two-term presidency. I’m not sure I’ll ever forget that.
Why Did I Rank it Here:
I could have gone either way on this one. 2012 is not a top ten, but it’s also not one of the worst. The GOP lost its brain after this election. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if Mitt had won. I’m not a big proponent of a healthy two-party system, but I think it might have been better if the result had been different.
We wrapped up Convention Week with Vice President Kamala Harris being nominated as the Democratic Party’s choice for president. If she wins this November—and Sweet Baby Jesus, I certainly hope she does—she will be eligible for reelection in 2028, when Donald Trump Jr. will presumably be the Republican nominee (His running mate will be former Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann, and the GOP strategy will be to put Minnesota in play).
I watched a little of the convention on Wednesday night, mainly to see Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg. But it got to be late, so I went to bed around 11:00 p.m. I’m sure he did great, but what I liked about the speakers I saw was how they praised Kamala Harris. It got me thinking.
Everyone should have a moment in their lives where a group of people gather together and chosen friends and family give rallying speeches about you.
Just think of our collective self-esteem if we held Convention Nights ™ nationwide.
Here’s an example:
“I nominate Anonymous, the most caring, gifted, kind, smart, beautiful, smart, pretty, pretty smart woman, for Wife of the Year. She will hold this distinction with great care as she cooks dinner and makes sure our bills are paid because, as everyone knows, I have no idea what happens to my money. And when you are a husband who doesn’t know where your money is, you need a woman you love and trust to magically make your life run smoothly.”
Cue the music.
Anonymous’s parents could come up next.
“We raised Anonymous to overcome anything if she worked hard and focused on fixing broken things. One example of this was when she married Christopher, a person who doesn’t know a thing about finances and is incapable of performing handiwork. If the toilet stops working, our Daughter, Anonymous, will make sure it gets fixed because she fixes things. We are proud to call Christopher our Son-In-Law because Anonymous took this simple, blissfully naïve man and gave him a house, a dog, and food. She is genuinely Wife of the Year.
Cue the music.
Anonymous could accept the nomination.
“I came from humble beginnings and lived with humility. I will throw away perfectly fine coffee because, in my humble opinion, it has gone bad. There is nothing that can stop me when I decide to clean the house and put things away that you will go for months and not be able to find. I do this because I’m good at it. I humbly accept your nomination for Wife of the Year.”
Cue to the Taylor Swift music.
Did you like this idea? I think it’s a great way to approach election season—get together and nominate people—Brother of the Week, Pet of the Decade, Neighbor of the Day, whatever. You don’t need anything fancy; grab a few friends, gallons of alcohol, play some music, and have some fun.
Convention Nights ™ sponsored by Okay History. Because your life should be in the spotlight, okay?
It’s the last weekend before the unofficial last weekend of summer. I’ve come to love this time of year. The days are just long enough; the weather has been perfect, and everything feels great as you enter the fall season. If you have kids, I hope the upcoming school year is excellent. If they run for office, remember it’s only for one year, so make the most of it.
I’ll be back on Monday. Thanks for your support of Okay History. I nominate all of you for Best Supporters of All Time. Get your speeches ready.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Okay,
Chris
I am very sorry that you gave such short shrift to the 2012 election. For me, it was the most important election in my life (up until that point, at least), possibly because I had so much invested in it myself. When Dolores and I saw how Obama was treated during his first term, from the very beginning, we vowed to do everything in our power to help him get reelected. The outrageous lies from the Tea Party, Rush Limbaugh and the violent opposition to the Affordable Care Act convinced us that the latent racism was now out in the open. Our basement became a staging area for volunteers to canvass all over Northern Virginia. At least 500 enthusiastic volunteers passed through training and spread out to get out the vote in 2012. Obama’s victory was a vindication of his first term, and it renewed my faith in the intelligence of the electorate.
Curiously enough, I thought Romney was a good person, and he probably would have been a decent President. That was before the dark side took over the Republican Party, and gave us the ugly situation that we are facing now, with the prospect that the personification of all that is dark and threatening is now in a position to become President again. As long as I have any energy left, I will do my best to make sure that doesn’t happen. Watching the Democratic Convention, I felt some of the Obama magic entering the arena again. Kamala Harris can hopefully channel some of the energy into a victory in November. A landslide victory, perhaps far fetched, would put to rest, once and for all, the notion that we are indifferent to what kind of person leads us, and prove once again that character and truth matter.
I love the idea that a group of people gathering to give great speeches about each other, but unfortunately that typically only happens at our funerals. We should do what we can to change that…